1. You had to share a room until you were 21.
2. You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum foil.
3. You are standing next to the two largest suitcases at the airport.
4. You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and think it s normal.
5. All your children have nicknames, which sound nowhere close to their real names.
6. You know someone with 20 kids
7. You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone’s house.
8. You can fit 10 people into a civic
9. Your parents never throw anything away and if you by some chance manage to get something to make it to the garbage can… it mysteriously appears back where it was again.
10. You have lace curtains.
11. You have lace tablecloths.
12. You have or had rugs on your walls.
13. Your mom tells you you’re too skinny even though your 30 pounds overweight.
14. Girls can t have boyfriends when they are 17 but they have to be married at 18.
15. Your parents tell you not to care what your friends think but they won’t let you do certain things because of what other ‘brat’ya’ and ’sestri’ will think.
16. You or your relatives have at least five gold teeth in their mouth.
17. Either you or 40 of your relatives drive a civic, eclipse, camry, bmw or accord.
18. Your car windows are tinted twice the legal limit.
19. Going over 100 mph is routine.
20. You’re driving on 2 tickets and don’t remember what your license looks like.
21. You’ve been driving without a license for 2 years.
22. You say “lets meet at 9″, you actually mean “I’ll wake up at 9, take a shower, eat, watch tv and meet you at 12″.
23. You stand around in circles of friends for an hour deciding what to do.
24. After leaving a restaurant, it actually means you’re going outside to the parking lot to talk for another hour.
25. Your uncle/dad fixes cars from the auction.
26. You drive a car bought from an auction. (which u will later sell and make a hefty profit off of unsuspecting American buyers).
27. You know your a new Russian immigrant if you wear church shoes with jeans, shorts, or slacks… while playing volleyball.
28. You know you are a new Russian immigrant if you tuck your shirt in your shorts.
29. At least 5 of your relatives are named Volodia, Yura, Olya, Oksana, Nataliya or Tanya
30. All of your CDs are burned, or u bought them at a Bazar for 2 bucks a piece.
31. You can make Perogis in 18 different flavors.
32. You get kicked out of every go kart, theme park, and anything potentially dangerous.
33. When you work at construction site.
34. You have five leather jackets and matching gloves.
35. You keep your stash of cash under your mattress instead of a savings account.
36. Twelve of your friends get into a movie with only one ticket.
37. Your house is full of foreign medicine that is probably illegal here.
38. You sing at every party you go to.
39. Your mom recycles plastic cups and plastic plates, and sandwich bags by washing them.
40. You don t know how to use a dishwasher.
41. You use grocery bags to hold garbage.
42. Your dad has butchered a pig or lamb.
43. You keep leftover food in your fridge in as many numbers of bowls as possible.
44. Your kitchen shelf is full of jam jars, varieties of bowls and plastic utensils.
45. You eat bread with everything.

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  1. MMe Stinkypants

    just described my uncle’s family in Toronto to a T.

  2. Veronica

    Oh my god this is my boyfriend! It is all so very true!

  3. kasyanyuk

    wow… how do you know these things? The ONLY untrue part is the construction worker one, but otherwise you know us all to well…

  4. David

    My Russian wife:

    1. Still hasn’t figured out how to use a clothes dryer, she made me put up clothes lines INSIDE the house.

    2. Hated everything I cooked for her (I was a sous chef) until I fryed up a sliced potato in anger. Upon presentation she stated: “Finally you cook something tasty!”

    3. Grew up without a telephone in her house yet somehow can’t manage NOT to be on hers for more than five minutes.

    4. Screams: “No shoes in house!” to ALL of our guests.

  5. Yana

    Soooo true.. the construction is questionable.. but still true for the most part

  6. Alex

    Wow that is so true. And hey no shoes in house is just a common sense….. lol

  7. Anton

    I would not agree with many statements here. However I am Russian.

  8. Anya

    Please leave your shoes at the door! or if the weather is nice, take them off befor entering the house!

    AND BY THE WAY, I LOVE FRIED POTATOS! YOUR WIFE IS A SMART ONE!

  9. Andrey

    Lets see, Im not a “new russian” so scratch those.
    Construction workers and golden teeth = southern parts of russia (Im from northern).
    I know how to use household electronics.
    I dont talk for an hour before leaving, only for 20-25 minutes.
    Other than that - ITS ALL TRUE! Oh and I also cant spell ;)

    PS: Fried sliced potato IS the greatest food and if you walk into the living room in dirty shoes, Im gona slap you silly, yell at you in russian and make YOU wash the floors.

  10. Alexander

    Interesting view of Russians by americos. Most of it - 98% - does not apply to a modern mid-income Russian living in Russia - anywhere leave alone Moscow where I am from. Maybe it applies to Russian jewish immigrants to America in the last century and their kids. But again, there are many people in Russia who wouldn’t understand this at all as they have none of the things described above (except fried potatos).

  11. Aleksandra

    hahahahahaha!!!!!!! 1,3,4,7,13,22,36,40 and 45 is about me cause I`m a typical Russian!!!! but gold teeth?!!! Rubbish!!! And I don`t know anyone who has 20 kids that`s for sure!!!!!

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