That was funny

1. Love is grand; divorce is at least a hundred grand.

2. Time may be a great healer, but it’s also a lousy beautician.

3. Remember: amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic.

4. Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.

5. Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels so good.

6. An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world. A pessimist fears that this is true.

7. Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just stand there.

8. My inferiority complex is not as good as yours is.

9. I am having an out of money experience.

10. It’s frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

11. You’re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.

12. Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.