Things I Learned in College

- That it didn’t matter how late I scheduled my first class; I’d sleep right through it.

- That I could change so much and barely realize it.

- That college kids throw airplanes too.

- That if you wear polyester everyone will ask you, “Why are you so dressed up?”

- That every clock on campus shows a different time.

- That if you were smart in high school–so what?

- That I would go to a party the night before a final.

- That Chem labs require more time than all my classes put together.

- That you can know everything and fail a test.

- That you can know nothing and ace a test.

- That I could get used to almost anything I found out about my roommate.

- That MOST of my education would be obtained outside of my classes.

- That I would be one of those people my parents warned me about.

- That free food served until 10:00 is gone by 9:50.

- That Sunday is a figment of the world’s imagination.

- That Psychology is really Biology, and that Biology is really Chemistry,

- That Chemistry is really Physics, and Physics is really Math.