The Last Ten Things

The last 10 things any woman would ever say:

10. Could our relationship be more physical? I’m tired of just being friends.
9. Go ahead and leave the seat up, it’s easier for me to douche that way.
8. I think hairy butts are really sexy
7. Hey, get a whiff of that one.
6. Please don’t throw that old t-shirt away, the holes in the armpits are just too cute.
5. This diamond is way to big.
4. I don’t even wanna put my lips on that thing unless I get to swallow.
3. Wow, it really is 14 inches!
2. Does this make my butt look too small?
1. I’m wrong, you must be right again.

The last 10 things any man would ever say:

10. I think Barry Manilow is one cool motherf**ker
9. While I’m up, can I get you a beer?
8. I think hairy butts are really sexy.
7. Her tits are just too big.
6. Sometimes I just want to be held.
5. That chick on Murder She Wrote gives me a woody.
4. Sure I’d love to wear a condom.
3. We haven`t been to the mall for ages, let’s go shopping and I’ll hold your purse.
2. F**k Monday Night Football, let’s watch Murphy Brown.
1. I think we’re lost, we’d better pull over and ask directions.