A Child’s Prayer
One night, a father passed by his son’s room and heard his son praying: “God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma. Ta ta, Grandpa.” The father didn’t quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next morning, they found Grandpa dead on the floor of a heart attack. The father reassured [...]
3 Couples, 2 Compliments, 1 Adventure
Three couples went to a restaurant. The women wanted to compliment the men with something that was on the table. “Could you pass me the sugar, sugar?” said the first gal. “Could you pass me the honey, honey?” said the second. “Could you pass me the bacon, pig?” said the third.
10 Things Men Won’t Say
1. Let’s watch Lifetime! 2. Sex is overrated. 3. I don’t want to go too far on the first date. 4. Yes, I did notice your sister’s breasts are bigger than yours. 5. There is nothing I like better than crawling into bed with a good book. 6. I’m glad I don’t have a large penis. [...]
$500 Porsche
A man was reading the paper when an ad caught his eye: $500 Porsche! New! The man thought that it was very unusual to sell a Porsche for $500, and he thought it might be a joke, but thought it was worth a shot. So he went to the lady’s house and sure enough, she [...]
Chinese in 21 easy lessons
Are you harboring a fugitive – Hu Yu Hai Ding See me A.S.A.P. – Kum Hia Nao Small Horse – Tai Ni Po Ni Your price is too high – No Bai Dam Thing Did you go to the beach – Wai Yu So Tan I bumped into a coffee table – Ai Bang Mai [...]
Things not to say to a naked man
I’ve Smoked Fatter Joints Than That. Ahhhh, It’s Cute. Why Don’t We Just Cuddle? You Know They Have Surgery To Fix That. Make It Dance. Can I Paint A Smiley Face On It? Wow, And Your Feet Are So Big. It’s OK, We’ll Work Around It. Will It Squeak If I Squeeze It? Oh No… [...]