That was funny

Two boys are playing football in the Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a Rottweiler.
Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog’s collar and twists, breaking the dog’s neck.
A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the [...]

On stag night, you take a real deer.
You use a 55 Chevy as a guest house.
Your back porch is bigger than your house.
There is more oil in your cap than in your car.
You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.
A full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
An expired license plate means [...]

Dear Child,
I am writing this slow because I know that you can’t read fast.
We don’t live where we did when you left home.
Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home so we moved.
I won’t be able to send you the address, as the last family that lived [...]

1. You had to share a room until you were 21.
2. You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum foil.
3. You are standing next to the two largest suitcases at the airport.
4. You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and think it s normal.
5. All your children [...]

Cracking an international market is a goal of most growing corporations. It shouldn’t be that hard, yet even the big multi-nationals run into trouble because of language and cultural differences. For example, observe the following examples below.
The name Coca-Cola in China was first rendered as Ke-kou-ke-la. Unfortunately, the Coke company did not discover until after [...]

A Texan, while visiting Toronto, found himself in the back seat of a taxi cab on the way to his hotel. Passing by the Royal York the Texan asked the cab driver “What’s that building there?” “That’s the Royal York Hotel” replied the cabbie. “The Royal York? How long did it take to build that?” [...]

A redneck wanted to learn how to skydive, so he got an instructor and started taking lessons. The instructor told the redneck to jump out of the plane and pull his ripcord. The instructor then explained that he himself would jump out right behind him so that they would go down together. The redneck understood [...]

12 pack of Bud
11 rasslin tickets
10 a Copenhagen
9 years probation
8 table dancers
7 pack of Redman
6 cans of spam
5 FLANNEL SHIRTS….
4 big mud tires
3 shotgun shells
2 hunting dogs
and parts to a Mustang GT…

1. Never take a beer to a job interview.
2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at
them.
3. It’s considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed it’s time to change
sheets.
5. Even if you’re CERTAIN that you are included in the will
… it is still considered tacky to [...]