Business one-liners

  1. A President of a democracy is a man who is always ready, willing, and able to lay down your life for his country.
  2. A backscratcher will always find new itches; a brown-noser will always find new sense.
  3. A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work.
  4. A bird in the bush usually has a friend in there with him.
  5. A bird in the hand is always safer than one overhead.
  6. A bird in the hand is dead.
  7. A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.
  8. A boss with no humor is like a job that is no fun.
  9. A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.
  10. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
  11. A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. - Milton Berle
  12. A committee is twelve men doing the work of one.
  13. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
  14. A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually.
  15. A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time.
  16. A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk. - Franklin D. Roosevelt
  17. A consultant is an ordinary person a long way from home.
  18. A coup that is known in advance is a coup that does not take place.
  19. A couple of months in the lab can often save a couple of hours in the library.
  20. A crisis is when you cannot say “let’s just forget the whole thing.”
Chocolate as art, Cute baby stills, Early computer and software ads, Mother-in-law’s choice, Amuzing sandwiches, Explain THAT to your insurance company, Food sculptures, Windows, In-laws, Computers contrast, Worlds smartest man, 7 things that would happen if you were a computer, Talented engineer, 30 signs that technology has taken over your life, Microsoft landing, Golfing, 19 recommendations from men to women, Careful what you wish for, If men were in charge of weddings, Two new additions to periodic table of elements, 29 rules of dating for women, Women talking, men hearing, Doctor’s help, How to read personal ads from women, Guest at a hotel, First date, Death Row in Women’s Prison, 12 things men know, Top male occupations, Car accident, What guys really mean, Las Vegas, Why married couples do not have sex, Letter from Wal-Mart, Dusty Underwear, Men and Women, Soup, Anniversary, University, New studio, Solid marriage, At the altar, Chances to get married, One kiss, Injury, 35 Predictions from 50’s, Top 10 signs your company is going to downsize, Top 10 signs you have eaten too much, 23 headlines of 2050, 53 signs you might have a drinking problem, 39 Headlines of the year, Let’s kill a bicycle repairman, 36 world’s smallest books, Commuting to work, Florist mixup, Job interview, Jamaica, The Weigh Scale, An expensive barbie doll, Psychology class, New driving test, Beautiful nature? No, just food, 34 Pacific Northwest jokes, 16 Montana rules, You know it’s July in Florida, Public school teacher, Great experiment, Laboratory, Thermometer, Poor man’s virus, Being old has some perks, Wrong bank, Definition of words used by women, 21 reasons why men are happier, Thoughtful husband, Four food groups for students, Gentlemen quiz, Blonde at a strip mall, Car hangers, Beach exercise, Wal-Mart announces house brand wine, Journey on a train carriage, Divorced barbie, Anxious cab driver, 75 things to do in a car, 8 Ways to be annoying in Australia, 554 ways to be annoying, Before and after marriage, Stoping a taxi, Eleven new drugs for women, Top ten things not to say on your Anniversary, The ten most wanted men, Think you have a cold day?, Secluded vacation, Witty ads from around the world, Cute babies, Perfect timing!, 15 ways to tell if someone is a teenager, Texas justice, 12 Lawyer Joke, Josh Groban | Noel

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