34 Pacific Northwest jokes

  1. You know the state flower is mildew.
  2. You know the state motto: “Rain? What rain?”
  3. You have a T-shirt that says, “200 Billion Slugs Can’t Be Wrong!”
  4. You use the term “sun break” and know what it means.
  5. You open the windows in the summer to let the warm air in.
  6. Your Early Girl tomatoes ripen in September.
  7. Names like Point No Point, Useless Bay, Deception Pass, Destruction Island and Friday Harbor don’t phase you.
  8. You feel guilty throwing out paper or aluminum cans.
  9. You know more people who own a boat than own an air conditioner.
  10. You will stand on a deserted corner in the rain and wait for the “Walk” signal.
  11. You feel overdressed if you wear a suit to a fancy restaurant.
  12. You can order coffee 10 different ways.
  13. You can taste the difference between Seattle’s Best, Tully’s and Starbucks.
  14. To you, swimming is an indoor sport.
  15. You never go camping without a poncho and waterproof matches.
  16. You know the difference between Coho, Chinook, and Sockeye salmon.
  17. You know how to pronounce Puyallup, Sequim, Sekiu, Yakima, Oregon, Wenatchee, Steilacoom, Quileute, Cle Elum and Willamette.
  18. You know Forks is not a bunch of eating utensil but a town on the Olympic Peninsula.
  19. You can tell the difference between Thai, Japanese and Chinese food.
  20. You know that Boring is not a state of mind, but a town in Oregon.
  21. You have no concept of humidity without precipitation.
  22. You know that a forecast of “rain, changing to showers” means “constant drizzle changing to intermittent drizzle.”
  23. You are not fazed by the weather forecast, “Today: Showers followed by rain. Tomorrow: Rain followed by showers.”
  24. You rejoice at a forecast of “rain with sun breaks.”
  25. You know what “The mountain is out” means.
  26. When the temperature gets above 50, you put on your shorts (If you’re warm blooded, that is. If you’re cold blooded, you wear a sweatshirt all summer.)
  27. You can point out at least two volcanoes, even if you can’t see through the cloud cover.
  28. You think people who use umbrellas are either tourists or wimps (or both).
  29. You have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.
  30. You knew immediately that the view out of Frazier’s window was fake.
  31. You use a down comforter and wear flannel pajamas in the summer.
  32. Your kid’s Halloween costumes fit under a raincoat.
  33. You know all the seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Raining (Spring), Road Construction (Summer), Deer and Elk season (Fall).
  34. Every year you have to buy new sunglasses because you can’t find the old ones after such a long time.
Chocolate as art, Cute baby stills, Early computer and software ads, Mother-in-law’s choice, Amuzing sandwiches, Explain THAT to your insurance company, Food sculptures, Windows, In-laws, Computers contrast, Worlds smartest man, 7 things that would happen if you were a computer, Talented engineer, 30 signs that technology has taken over your life, Microsoft landing, Golfing, 19 recommendations from men to women, Careful what you wish for, If men were in charge of weddings, Two new additions to periodic table of elements, 29 rules of dating for women, Women talking, men hearing, Doctor’s help, How to read personal ads from women, Guest at a hotel, First date, Death Row in Women’s Prison, 12 things men know, Top male occupations, Car accident, What guys really mean, Las Vegas, Why married couples do not have sex, Letter from Wal-Mart, Dusty Underwear, Men and Women, Soup, Anniversary, University, New studio, Solid marriage, At the altar, Chances to get married, One kiss, Injury, 35 Predictions from 50’s, Top 10 signs your company is going to downsize, Top 10 signs you have eaten too much, 23 headlines of 2050, 53 signs you might have a drinking problem, 39 Headlines of the year, Let’s kill a bicycle repairman, 36 world’s smallest books, Commuting to work, Florist mixup, Job interview, Jamaica, The Weigh Scale, An expensive barbie doll, Psychology class, New driving test, Beautiful nature? No, just food, 34 Pacific Northwest jokes, 16 Montana rules, You know it’s July in Florida, Public school teacher, Great experiment, Laboratory, Thermometer, Poor man’s virus, Being old has some perks, Wrong bank, Definition of words used by women, 21 reasons why men are happier, Thoughtful husband, Four food groups for students, Gentlemen quiz, Blonde at a strip mall, Car hangers, Beach exercise, Wal-Mart announces house brand wine, Journey on a train carriage, Divorced barbie, Anxious cab driver, 75 things to do in a car, 8 Ways to be annoying in Australia, 554 ways to be annoying, Before and after marriage, Stoping a taxi, Eleven new drugs for women, Top ten things not to say on your Anniversary, The ten most wanted men, Think you have a cold day?, Secluded vacation, Witty ads from around the world, Cute babies, Perfect timing!, 15 ways to tell if someone is a teenager, Texas justice, 12 Lawyer Joke, Josh Groban | Noel

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