10 Fun Marketing Facts Will

The world of marketing and advertising is a fascinating one, there’s no doubt about it. But just how fascinating and what exactly makes it so appealing to many? Here are a few mind-blowing facts that should answer to your question. Fun Fact #1: You can’t eat most food in commercials. Because of the overly exaggerated […] more…

Great writer

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed a desire to become a “great” writer. When asked to define “great” he said “I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, wail, […] more…

The mystery of childbirth

A boy is writing a paper on childbirth and asks his parents, “How was I born?” His mother awkwardly answers, “The stork brought you.” “Oh,” says the boy. “Well, how were you and Daddy born?” “Oh, the stork brought us, too, and Grandpa and Grandma.” The boy begins his paper, “This report has been very […] more…

In plain English

The man told his doctor that he wasn’t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, “Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me.” “Well, in plain English,” the doctor replied, “you’re just lazy.” […] more…

Leftover change

A bus driver on his route sees a van from the zoo stranded on the side of the road. The zoo worker offers the bus driver $100 to help him deliver two dozen penguins. The bus driver agrees and loads the penguins on the bus. An hour later, the zoo worker gets his van fixed […] more…

Who needs Photoshop?

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Inspirational quotes with pictures

Stay out of trouble. more…

And then the fight started …

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, "What’s on TV?" I said, "Dust." And then the fight started… more…

Funny pictures of animals saying “Let’s talk”

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Veggie art

No animals were harmed producing these famous reproductions. Bonus points for recognizing the actual paintings and linking to the originals in the comments. more…

Espresso art

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Programmer smoking

A guy is standing on the corner of the street smoking one cigarette after another. A lady walking by notices him and says “Hey, don’t you know that those things can kill you? I mean, didn’t you see the giant warning on the box?!” “That’s OK” says the guy, puffing casually “I’m a computer programmer” […] more…

Young programmer

A young Programmer and his Project Manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to Wichita. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother. After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young programmer […] more…

Programming languages are like cars

Assembler: A formula I race car. Very fast but difficult to drive and maintain. FORTRAN II: A Model T Ford. Once it was the king of the road. FORTRAN IV: A Model A Ford. FORTRAN 77: a six-cylinder Ford Fairlane with standard transmission and no seat belts. COBOL: A delivery van. It’s bulky and ugly […] more…

Hot air balloon

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?” The man below says: “Yes, you’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above […] more…

Infinite loop

A mathematician, a physicist, an engineer, and a programmer were discussing the theorem that all odd numbers are prime. Mathematician: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not prime. The theorem is false. Physicist: 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not, 11 is…. The theorem is […] more…

How to catch an elephant in Africa

* MATHEMATICIANS hunt elephants by going to Africa, throwing out everything that is not an elephant, and catching one of whatever is left. * EXPERIENCED MATHEMATICIANS will attempt to prove the existence of at least one unique elephant before proceeding to step 1 as a subordinate exercise. * PROFESSORS OF MATHEMATICS will prove the existence […] more…

Drug dealers vs. software developers

Drug dealers: Refer to their clients as “users”. “The first one’s free!” Have important South-East Asian connections (to help move the stuff). Strange jargon: “Stick”, “Rock”, “Dime bag,” “E”. Realize that there’s tons of cash in the 14- to 25-year-old market. Job is assisted by industry’s producing newer, more potent mixes. Often seen in the […] more…

Hot air balloon

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?” The man below says: “Yes, you’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above […] more…

Funny outdoor ads

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Husband of the year awards

Honorable mention: UK.   more…

Bra size calculator

Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn’t figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed! (A} Almost Boobs… {B} Barely there. {C} Can’t Complain! {D} Dang! […] more…

What Religion is Your Bra?

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy’s and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, ‘I’d like to buy a bra for my wife.’ ‘What type of bra?’ asked the clerk. ‘Type?’ inquires the man, ‘There’s more than one type?’ ‘Look around,’ said the saleslady, as she showed […] more…

Nine ways to know if you have estrogen issues

1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2. You’re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet. 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say. 5. You ‘re using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: ‘How’s my […] more…

Pregnancy Q & A

Q: Should I have a baby after 35? A: No, 35 children is enough. Q: I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? A: With any luck, right after he finishes college. Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby’s sex? A: Childbirth. Q: My wife is five months pregnant […] more…

Fabulous Russian cakes

148 of them, bookmark this page to view one cake a day, and you’re set for half a year. more…

Vegetable sculptures

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Questions NOT to ask at the job interview

What’s your company’s policy on severance pay? How long does it take your company’s bureaucracy to get around to firing somebody for poor performance? Do you have a random drug testing policy? Does your company’s life insurance cover suicide? How in depth are your criminal background checks? Does your company’s insurance consider genital herpes a […] more…

I will take two

“This little computer,” said the sales clerk, “will do half your job for you.” Studying the machine the senior VP decided, “Fine, I’ll take two.” more…

New dean

Listening to the commencement address by the new dean, Professor Papp turned to a woman sitting beside him. “Can you believe that the trustees named someone so ugly to be our new dean?” Stiffening, the woman said, “I beg your pardon, but do you know who I am?” Turning to study her, the professor replied, […] more…

Blackmail

“Hey, Mom,” asked Ralph. “Will you lend me five dollars?” “Certainly not.” “If you do,” he went on, “I will tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop.” The woman’s ears perked and, grabbing her pocketbook, she handed over the money. “Well? What did he say?” “He said, […] more…

Adopted son

The backwoods couple was delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end. The adoption center called adn told them they had a wonderful Japanese boy, and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way back home, they stopped by the local college to enroll in night courses. After […] more…

Are you choking?

Out to lunch one day, the immigrants were having a fine time until Hymie began to gag. “I think I svallowed a bone,” Hymie gasped. “Hymie,” said Miklos, “are you choking?” “No, I am serious!” more…

Watermelon art

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Your Mom doesn’t pick favorites

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41 facts about Washington

1. It is America’s coffee capital, with more coffee bean roasters per capita than any other state. 2. ‘The Wave’, a popular fan cheer for the past 25 years, was started by Husky fans at the University of Washington. 3. Adam Morrison, a Washington State native and Gonzaga University basketball star, leads the NCAA Division […] more…

Chocolate as art

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Cute baby stills

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Early computer and software ads

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Mother-in-law’s choice

A young man finds the woman of his dreams and asks her to marry him. He tells his mother he wants her to meet his fiance, but he wants to make a bit of a game out of it. He says he’ll bring the girl over with two other women and see if his mother […] more…

Amuzing sandwiches

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Explain THAT to your insurance company

Weirdest traffic accidents and most unbelievable parking jobs. more…

Food sculptures

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Windows

Tech Support: “Do you have any windows open right now?” Customer: “Are you crazy woman, it’s twenty below outside!” more…

In-laws

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?” “Yep,” the wife replied, “in-laws.” more…

Computers contrast

In Computer Heaven: The management is from Intel, The design and construction is done by Apple, The marketing is done by Microsoft, IBM provides the support, Gateway determines the pricing. In Computer Hell: The management is from Apple, Microsoft does design and construction, IBM handles the marketing, The support is from Gateway, Intel sets the […] more…

World’s smartest man

A pilot, Michael Jordon, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a pizza delivery man were all in a plane together traveling through stormy conditions. Suddenly, the pilot ran back to the passengers and announced that lightning had hit the plane, and they were going to crash in a matter of minutes. “There are only enough parachutes […] more…

7 things that would happen if you were a computer

You could add/remove someone in your life using the control panel. You could put your kids in the recycle bin and restore them when you feel like it! You could improve your appearance by adjusting the display settings. You could turn off the speakers when life gets too noisy. You could click on “find” (Ctrl, […] more…

Talented engineer

The authorities were leading a priest, a drunkard and an engineer to the guillotine. They asked the priest if he wanted to face up or down when he meets his fate. The priest said that he would like to face up so that he will be looking toward heaven when he dies. So, they raise […] more…

30 signs that technology has taken over your life

1. Your stationery is more cluttered than Warren Beatty’s address book. The letterhead lists a fax number, e-mail addresses for two on-line services, and your Internet address, which spreads across the breadth of the letterhead and continues to the back. In essence, you have conceded that the first page of any letter you write *is* […] more…

Microsoft landing

A pilot is flying a small, single-engine, charter plane with a couple of really important executives on board into Seattle airport. There is fog so thick that visibility is 40 feet, and his instruments are out. He circles looking for a landmark and after an hour, he is low on fuel and his passengers are […] more…

Golfing

One weekend four married guys went golfing. During the 4th hole, the following conversation took place. First Guy: “You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out golfing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend.” Second Guy: […] more…

19 recommendations from men to women

Never buy a ‘new’ brand of beer because ‘it was on sale.’ If we’re in the backyard and the TV in the den is on, that doesn’t mean we’re not watching it. Don’t tell anyone we can’t afford a new car. Tell them we don’t want one. Whenever possible please try to say whatever you […] more…

Careful what you wish for

“Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, classical music, even how to invest in the stock market,” said the man. “Sounds […] more…

If men were in charge of weddings

1. There would be a “Rehearsal Kegger” rather than a “Rehearsal Dinner.” 2. Bridesmaids would wear matching blue jeans cutoffs and halter tops. They would have NO tan lines. 3. Tuxes would have team logos on the back and the Nike shoes would have matching team colors. (My fiance threatened to have his and his […] more…

Two new additions to periodic table of elements

Element name: WOMAN Symbol: WO Atomic weight: (don’t even go there) Physical properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze at any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if mishandled. Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Volatile when left alone. Able […] more…

Women talking, men hearing

What a Woman Says: “This place is a mess! C’mon, You and I need to clean up. Your stuff is lying on the floor, and if we don’t do laundry right now you’ll have no clothes to wear.” What a Man Hears: blah, blah, blah, blah, C’MON blah, blah, blah, YOU AND I blah, blah, […] more…

Doctor’s help

A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable cold. His doctor prescribed some pills, but they didn’t help. On his next visit the doctor gave him a shot, but that didn’t do any good. On his third visit the doctor told the man to go home and take a […] more…

How to read personal ads from women

40-ish…………………………49 Adventurous…………………Slept with all your friends Athletic……………………….No boobs Average looking……………..Ugly Beautiful………………………Pathological liar Contagious Smile…………….Does a lot of pills Emotionally secure…………..On medication Feminist……………………….Fat Free spirit……………………..Junkie Friendship first……………….Former slut Fun…………………………….Annoying Gentle…………………………Dull New Age………………………Body hair in the wrong places Open-minded…………………Desperate Outgoing………………………Loud and Embarrassing Passionate……………………Sloppy drunk Poet……………………………Depressive Professional…………………..Bitch Romantic………………………Frigid Voluptuous……………………Very Fat Large frame…………………..Hugely Fat Wants Soul mate…………….Stalker Widow…………………………Murderer more…

Guest at a hotel

A guest in a posh hotel comes down to breakfast and called over the head waiter and read from the menu “I’d like one under cooked egg so that it’s running, and one over cooked egg that’s tough and hard to eat. I’d also like grilled bacon which is a bit on the cold side, […] more…